Two things I can't handle well but want to be able to deal with gracefully: debates and publicity.
These aren't things I seek out. They're not things I anticipate wanting to seek out. Not for their own sake, anyway. However,
- I'm terrified of them.
- I try to confront the things I'm terrified of. (Preferably with a helmet. And a backup plan. And possibly a lightsaber.)
Learning how to handle something well usually means practicing the handling of it, which makes me flinch a little (but not shy away, I hope). I want to be able to handle these things well so that when I choose not to, I know I'm choosing not to deal with it for good reasons, not "because I am afraid I cannot do it."
As with all hopes, they generally won't go anywhere unless I do something about it.
- I started looking for people and organizations in the Boston area that work on speech therapy, and contacted a few, just to find out more.
- I'm trying to be more conscious of clearly communicating in person, especially my speech (stuff like oral-nasal resonance and developing the muscle memory I need to pronounce consonants correctly). As a bonus side effect, I get to memorize poetry and amuse fellow passengers on the train. (Ooh. I could memorize poetry in non-English languages as well, and up my language-fu. Oooooh.)
- I'm trying to seek out, create, and not-turn-down opportunities to work on speaking, debating, and being-paid-attention-to. (I find the last one is easiest when I use it as a way to immediately funnel attention to Other People Who Deserve it More. But I need to be able to do a slightly more graceful funnel, and not just kinda shuffle awkwardly around.) The speaking and debating (and presenting, for that matter) have been mostly informal lately, since I'm being either overly wimpy or very gentle with myself, depending on which way you want to look at it. Workin' on it.
- I've considered trying out videoblogging. Um... yes. I'll think about this more. I think I should do it, and I need something to do it for. (Also, I need to check out the tools Chris wrote about - thanks, Chris!)
Where does this fall on my priorities list? None of it is a concrete project yet, so nowhere, really; it's a general background awareness thing. That is to say, it's background noise but growing louder. I'll keep an eye open for ways I can fold this more concretely into an actual project. I probably have enough to do right now that I shouldn't start new ones. Yet, anyway. Need to see what else is on my plate now first.