Before my mother was a mother, she was a dentist. I'm not sure how many other kindergarteners got bedtime stories about gingivitis, but I always thought they were hilarious (if somewhat embarrassing).

So when I was 11 or so, I wrote her this parody, set to the tune of "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" from Mary Poppins. I've written many parodies since, including "Stuck in the Dealership" (to "Day-Oh") when my parents were buying a new car, but none have ever quite become as popular as this one.

I've made two minor edits from the original here. "While demonstrating this with plastic teeth she had out on display" was originally "And ended with a sermon saying why I couldn't play," (which worked a lot better when I was 11...) and the last line's "modify" was originally "work upon." Otherwise, what you're seeing is the original from 10 years ago.

Love you, Mom. (Miss you too.)

(In case you don't know the tune, listen to this - song starts a minute or so into the video.)

The dentist song

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
You should brush your teeth or you will get some halitosis
Or else rinse with Listerine in super-heavy doses
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Um-diddle-diddle, um-diddle-ay
Um-diddle-diddle, um-diddle-ay

One day I didn't brush my teeth and went down in a rush
My mother yelled because I smelled and said "go back and brush,"
I asked her what the big deal was and after a short pause
She said "well, you should brush your teeth more often just because..."

(Oh!)

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
You should brush your teeth or you will get some halitosis
Or else rinse with Listerine in super-heavy doses
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Um-diddle-diddle, um-diddle-ay
Um-diddle-diddle, um-diddle-ay

Another time I didn't brush my mother came to say,
"Your teeth will rot, your breath will stink, unless you brush today,"
And she went on to talk about how plaque can cause decay
While demonstrating this with plastic teeth she had out on display

(Why!)

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
You should brush your teeth or you will get some halitosis
Or else rinse with Listerine in super-heavy doses
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Um-diddle-diddle, um-diddle-ay
Um-diddle-diddle, um-diddle-ay

So finally I brushed my teeth and joined my smiling mother
She told the ranks of pearly teeth, "we finally have another!"
Your questions and your stinky breath were such an awful bother -
Come on, let's try to modify the hygiene of your brother!

(Since!)

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
You should brush your teeth or you will get some halitosis
Or else rinse with Listerine in super-heavy doses
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
(Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!)