As readers of this blog will notice, I tend to very publicly state my weak spots in the hopes that they'll be exploited and thereby give me more opportunities to learn to patch them, and also in the hopes that others will point out weak spots and propose fixes. It's kinda like "Mel, the open-source project."
Along those lines, here are some major flaws I possess.
- Perfectionism which leads to a tendency to fall behind. As behindness increases, so does guilt, and I feel compelled to raise the bar of the quality of the thing I'm making to compensate for the tardiness. The quality-bar rises exponentially over time, the quality I can possibly put into something rises almost linearly and then asymptotes at some finite positive number, and so the feasibility of meeting my expectations (which is quality-possible divided by quality-expected) drops rapidly to zero.
- An inability to say no without apologizing for the refusal. Again, guilt kicks in for having disappointed someone, even if what they were asking for is unreasonable and I have previously stated that I can't or won't do it. I don't do the thing I said I wouldn't do, but I usually end up overcompensating so as to not make them feel bad; this is the equivalent of someone asking you for $2 and you saying "No, but... I'm sorry, I'll... I'll lend you $2000!"
- Overuse of disclaimers weakens my conciseness. It also weakens my position and makes me - not just seem, but think - in a more wishy-washy manner.
I'm trying to fight the first by shipping imperfection before the due date with a disclaimer that it's a draft. I'm trying to fight the second by censoring the apology (I do continue to propose alternative routes of action to people i turn down... I'm just learning how to make those alternative routes Not Include Me So Much).
Also, hurrah for the IPA!
Also also, (with great difficulty) you can do what you would do if you were a better person than you actually are. Maybe it makes you a better person and maybe it doesn't; I tend to lean towards the "doesn't," or at least a "doesn't necessarily." But in any case, the end result is that you've done what a better person would have, so something's better, right?
I sure don't envy that better person. The things they do are freaking exhausting, and I'm like to drop over on my feet half the time as is. They'd do it somehow, though, so sometimes I can also try to do it too.
In other news, setting up for screenprinting is a very labor-intensive effort made somewhat more enjoyable by high-pressure garden hoses.