I don't usually do blog posts full o' links, but these made me chortle (and humor is something I need massive doses of at the moment). Actual original content coming next.
Game villains must have no interest in ever leaving their various lairs and/or hideouts, because the sheer number of spinning blades, falling blocks and other torture devices crammed into every conceivable corner renders them all horrible deathtraps. It’s a wonder Bowser can find his way past the Whomps and rotary knives to go to the bathroom, let alone oversee his military operations outside the castle (not to mention having to deal with the multitudes of work-related injury claims from his Koopa staff).
Maybe the reason why I'm terrible at gaming is that I learned physics before I learned video games.
Even better: 5 things hollywood thinks computers can do.
Beyond #5 ("You Can Blow Up Shit At Will – With Hacking") there are gems like... (From "A Computer Might Become Self-Aware At Any Moment")
The microwave-sized IMSAI 8080 computer the hero [Matthew Broderick's character in Wargames] used to take over the nation’s nuclear missile fleet had 64KB of memory. That means if it tried to open this article as a Word document, it’d get about half way through before it ran out.
(From "Computers can talk to *#%*@ UFOs")
The Earth is under attack by a race of vastly advanced aliens, so Jeff Goldblum creates a virus from his PowerBook that disables the entire apparently Macintosh-compatible fleet of ships... But of course, there is exactly one reason why the aliens were defeated by a PowerBook in Independence Day: because Apple paid for it as part of the product placement. Yes, my friends, the entire plot culminated in an advertisement, and one you paid to see.
Then there's the "Bad grammar makes me [sic]" shirt, which I would totally have gotten for my editors at Frankly Speaking years ago, if I'd seen it then.